Praying for a Miracle

So, I know...no blog post for months...and then bam!  Well, here it is.  I haven't been too sure one tells everyone this.  But I do know that as a day to day thing, it is obvious I am not feeling well, and for those that think I can do everything, and when I say no, it seems that I don't care, that is definitely not the case.  I have definitely, haven't been myself at all over the last few months.

I don’t see most of you on a day to day basis. So for that you wouldn’t have notice that I am sick. Others have be lucky enough to see me keel over in pain or slow down enough that you can tell something is wrong.

After months of not feeling well, I was diagnosed in September with having a lump found in my uterus, known as a Fibroid, it was 7 cm in diameter at that time. Since then, I had been waiting to get in to see a specialist, and hopeful for surgery. I recently found out that the where the lump is positioned and the size of it, that surgery would be too risky in fear that they would have to do a whole hysterectomy. The fibroid is pushing within my uterus and within my body and they figure that I try to cope with it before we just remove it. I have compared to the feeling that I am in my first trimester of pregnancy (and no I am not pregnant) with feeling nausea, lack of energy, and unusual cramping, it’s known as my alien baby that doesn’t have a name. I do know that it is very common for females to have lumps in their uterus, and some basically don’t even know they are there or are easily treatable.

So coping with it, means that I am on a drug treatment, of hormones and narcotics, which I am more frustrated about because ultimately I want the pain to be gone, and not just mask the problems. It has also, been getting drastically worse since September, I am finding each day there is different pain, or even unable to get out of bed some days with lack of energy. Darcy and I have found peace with God about long term affects this may have but ultimately have to be patient with myself as my day to day functions have been limited, which also means, no cycling, and no physical activity.  Right now the doctors are hopeful that long term I would still be able to get pregnant but they don't want to do anything that will change it without trying first!

So I ask that you join me in praying for me, as I experience pain and patience as I “wait this out” as I physically am unable to do things and mentally distracted. And also, my sincere apologies if I seem distant (my painkillers are great).

Thanks in advance for your prayers and understanding.